Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Joe and Barack Go to Arlen Burger


"So tell me, Joe. Are things finally squared away again with Senator Specter?"

"Not quite, Mr. President."

"What is it this time, Joe?"

"Well, now Arlen says that Harry Reid also promised him a satisfying, thick, juicy burger but didn't follow through on that, either."

"Are you kidding me?"

"I kid you not, Mr. President."

"All right, then. Ray?"

"Yes, Mr. President!"

"Ray, can you throw another burger on the grill for Senator Specter?"

"Yes, Mr. President!"

"Only instead of cooking it medium-well, Ray, I want you to burn it."

"Burn it, Mr. President?"

"That's right, Ray. I want you to burn it. I want that burger to look like Rush Limbaugh's kidney after Wanda Sykes got through with it."

"Mr. President!"

"What? Too much?"

"Just a little, Mr. President!"

"All right, then. Cook Arlen's burger medium-well, too. But no fancy mustard for him."

"Ah, Mr. President? About that fancy mustard --"

"I don't want to hear it, Joe. And you, Ray, I know that look. Did I offend you again or something?"

"No, Mr. President. It's your credit card. It's been declined."

"Are you kidding me?"

"I kid you not, Mr. President."

"All right, then. Joe, you have any cash on you?"

"Mr. President, are you kidding me?"