Because it's Christmas, and Captain Picard is awesome.
Merry Christmas, readers!
Because it's Christmas, and Captain Picard is awesome.
If only for
a day or two earlier this week, I topped one of my favorites, Greg Gutfeld, on Amazon.
So true, and so very freakin' awesome...
For the last 12 years, I've been not-so-secretly trying to turn my Canadian
wife into an American. But last night after work, I realized I was watching a
Canadian TV show about bush pilots flying C-46s and DC-3s up the
Well played, my love. Well played.
A memory of my West LA days...
Simply put, Russian President Vladimir Putin -- that's right, this guy --
Sometimes, being a Breaking Bad fan is just too much fun...
Many thanks to the Sunday Morning Book Thread over at Ace of Spades HQ for featuring not only I Would Like My Bailout in Bacon but also Let No False Angels. I can now say I've finally had a Neo experience of randomly checking my book sales, feeling my jaw drop, and then going "Whoa..."
Especially given that I Would Like My Bailout in Bacon cracked the Amazon Top 10 in political humor for the first time last night:
Dear Angry Young Man who just came to my door and tried to sell me a newspaper subscription to fund your supposed college education...
Rapidly and loudly talking over me when I try to ask you a question is not a good start.
Getting sullen and insulting when I politely turn down your offer is not going to convince me to change my mind.
Having one of your friends lurking noisily but just out of sight beside the apartment door is also not going to convince me to change my mind. Or intimidate me.
And no, you don't get to pet my dog after calling me a name.
Good luck with my neighbors, though. You're definitely going to need it.
No day starts well when you wake up before the alarm all sweating and tense from a stress dream. Especially one where I was the mayor of major American city that apparently only employed obnoxious, out-of-control children. And I mean literal children, no more than seven or eight years old. So I did what any good mayor would do. I fired them all, only to be crucified in the media and by the public for being mean to little children.
At least it wasn't the recurring dream where I had to repeat high school but didn't know my schedule or my locker or my home room. Or the nightmare from last week that was running on Windows 8. My subconscious has some truly scary app tiles on its Start Screen, let me tell you.
No day restarts well when you get back to sleep, then wake up, again before the alarm, to the sound of the dog preparing to hurl a piece of chewtoy she apparently ate the day before onto the carpet beside your bed. It was a deep, awful, horking sound, but at least I got her to the bathroom tile before anything emerged, though she did lick my face in loving doggy gratitude immediately after, before I could stop her.
No day ends well when you spill water on your keyboard, then five minutes later spill coffee on that same keyboard. No tab, no letter c, and no Enter after that, even when everything had dried out. Goodbye, wireless keyboard I had only started using the week before.
At least it was a cheap one, and the keyboard that came with the new Windows 8 desktop that inspired the nightmare mentioned above is actually quieter. That's important, given how I learned my Qwerty fingering on an old manual typewriter and still pound the keys like a driver struggling with the powerless steering on an unresponsive land whale of a car. Plus, the loud clacking annoys my wife, especially when she's trying to sleep in the next room.
So I really hated yesterday, even if I did get some good writing done. And if today isn't an improvement, I will publicly embarrass it on the Internet as well.
Your move, Wednesday.
So, Amazon seems to think that my 8 year old daughter who has some Warriors books (cats with a human wizards and warriors society) loaded onto the kindle should try Wesley Morrison’s “Let No False Angels.”
Because today is, well, you know...
I've had a lot of unexpected joys since I started publishing as an indie. Not many of them match the one I had this morning, when I checked how I Would Like My Bailout in Bacon was doing over at Amazon:
Just a housekeeping note that my writing blog is now up and running. That one will be politics-free, unlike here. So if you prefer your geekery without politics, you'll find a home there. If you want geekery and politics, though, you'll still have an irregularly updated home here.
I can't say if Pepe's tacos are any good, but given I found this sign on the ground pointing toward a set of bushes, I'm not optimistic...
"My love, that was a subtle hint for you to get me the milk from the refrigerator."
"You know what might have worked better? Just asking me would I please get you the milk from the refrigerator."
"You're such a guy sometimes."
If Rankin/Bass had ever done an animated steampunk version of Dr. Zhivago, it would have looked like this...
Amazon just recommended my own book to me. Unfortunately, I already know how that one ends.
As always, click to embiggen.
“Well, that was just a big barrelful of awkward...”
This weekend, I saw one of my nieces marry a truly fantastic guy. President Obama dealt with the fallout over the IRS deliberately targeting his political opponents.
This weekend, I had two fantastic plane rides and absolutely no TSA troubles. President Obama dealt with all the lies about Benghazi and a dead U.S. ambassador no longer holding water.
This weekend, I finally got to spend time with my other niece's new husband, who is every bit the great guy I'd hoped that he would be. President Obama dealt with outrage over his Justice Department spying on the Associated Press.
This weekend, I saw relatives as well as current and former in-laws for the first time years. President Obama dealt with his Secretary of Health and Human Services shaking down the very people she regulates for donations to a private group created to help promote ObamaCare.
My weekend is over, but President Obama's is just beginning...
"If you were a clone and couldn't remember everything, I would forgive you."
"That's what your last clone said."
Total. Geek. Heaven.
Step 1: Slice open thumb while trying to open soup without spraying it all over the kitchen cabinets.
Step 2: Spray soup all over the kitchen cabinets.
Step 3: Hear soup explode in microwave; watch dog run into different room.
Step 4: Burn fingertips removing soup from microwave.
Step 5: Realize you bought the wrong soup, so lunch was doomed from the start.
The White House has released the following photo as evidence that President Obama really, truly does enjoy skeet shooting "all the time," even though he never once mentioned it during his entire first term in office (not even when Jared Loughner shot all those people in Arizona, including Congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords, and the gun issue was front and center) or during the 2008 campaign (not even to dig out from under that "bitter clingers" remark):
This official White House photograph is being made available only for publication by news organizations and/or for personal use printing by the subject(s) of the photograph. The photograph may not be manipulated in any way and may not be used in commercial or political materials, advertisements, emails, products, promotions that in any way suggests approval or endorsement of the President, the First Family, or the White House.I doubt anyone will think the President, the First Family, or the White House approves of this blog post or endorses this blog, so I think I'm covered. And the Interwebs, of course, are too scared to even consider manipulating this image in any way.
First Lady Michelle Obama:
Because the wait for the last batch of Breaking Bad episodes is really, really getting to me...
Major spoiler alerts for anyone who hasn't seen all the aired episodes yet.
First Lady Michelle Obama:
NSFW, but I laughed until I cried...
So, as of today, at the start of 2013, it seems the only two people in Washington, DC, still capable of actually negotiating a compromise of any kind, on anything, are Drunk Uncle (Joe Biden) and Stick-Up-His-Butt Uncle (Mitch McConnell).
Is this a great country or what?